I wrote an article here about recovering from mistakes. In it, I gave 5 ways to recover from your mistakes. In this series, I will look at each one a little deeper.
1. Accept the mistake.
2. Don’t beat yourself up.
3. Find value.
4. Have a main goal to shift back to.
5. Don’t take yourself too seriously.
Today we’re on #2. Don’t beat yourself up.
Your’re gonna be ok. You probably know exactly why you made the mistake and you most likely have good reasons behind the decisions you made that led to the mistake. Even if you have no idea what happened or you just spaced out or didn’t plan well or whatever, it really doesn’t do any good to yell at yourself for something you already feel terrible about.
By beating yourself up over a mistake, you are actually holding a grudge against yourself. That takes a lot of effort. Being angry at yourself probably takes twice the emotional and physical energy of being angry at others. Not only are you lashing out against yourself, you are also taking the lashing! Then out of frustration, you lash out again, only to be followed by more anger. The cycle repeats itself.
Ultimately, you become more angry and resentful towards yourself and it goes beyond the mistake. You begin to question your motives and judgement. All the while, draining yourself of the energy that could be used to work towards a solution.
Again, it’s not the end of the world. Even God says he’ll forgive every sin, so I think it’s a bit presumptuous to not forgive ourselves. Besides that, if we’re not thinking clearly, we’ll miss the opportunity to turn the mistake into a positive. That’s also called “finding value” and we’ll explore that idea in the next entry for this series on “recovering from mistakes.”
In the meantime, get over it already…